Struggling

Why are morning such a time of rejuvenation! Even though I don't really look forward to the getting up portion with my crazy flat hair and lovely clean breath...I love that everything is new! Grace and mercy seem to just fall over me as I begin to think, pray and plan for another day. Karoline and Jared are usually both dead to the world when I am awake so it's quite peaceful around the Billups' casa. BUT...the Lord has heard my cry over not being able to love my baby before school...SO...He has been waking her up in just enough time for me to be able to kiss, rock and dote on her for the last week! I love it!!! Jared is not really a big fan but ya know he will survive..hehe!

On another note on the same page...
I am really struggling with the fact that I am a full time teacher, mother, housecleaner, laundromat, minister's wife...the list seems to go on forever!!! I just don't understand how I can be following the Lord's will when I see my family only a quarter of the day. I am really feeling like a failure because of my lack of skill at my many job. It seems like the one I am great at doesn't even involve my family. To say the least, I am struggling! I so badly want to be home to take care of my family and do all those glorious wife-ly things most women complain about. I would love to have the time to clean my house, cook dinner, wash clothes, feed the baby in more than the hour between when I get home and Jared leaves for class.

Sweet Jesus, take us through the fire because we know that it is there that You will refine us in to a more perfect image of You! Stay beside us to remind us of the calling that you have placed on our lives. Your love is sufficient for all amounts of time for family and life. Show us how to live quality not just quantity filled lives. Teach us to say not to the things that are just taking up space and embrace the moments that will bond us together! In the name of the One who is FAITHFUL to hear us cry out...Amen.