Welcome to Holland

Klaire Grace's teacher read this to me today during our meeting. I wanted to share it with you because I think it will impact you too. So many of us in one way or another are in our own Holland. Let us celebrate together in her beauty and grace. Here's to Holland!

WELCOME TO HOLLAND
by Emily Perl Kingsley

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability- to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this...

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip -to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

" Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills... and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy...and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ...about Holland.


KG's AI (Auditory Impairment) teacher began discussing the "grieving process" with me today. I immediately told her that I was not grieving. I, in fact, was fine. Well, she began to discuss it anyways and before I knew it, my heart was broken open in front of a stranger because I was actually grieving. I had no idea!!! Why didn't anyone tell me that had a loss and now I was grieving it?!?? I totally was under the impression that we had hit a communication barrier and we diligently working to overcome it.

A new reality once again.

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Homemade Attire

This is now taking up all my time :)

May...

May...

-We have 5 days of school left before summer. :)

-A new teacher from the day school for the deaf is seeing us twice a month. She is going to be educating us on KG's hearing issues. Her developmental therapist is now coming 3X a month. We are having a new speech eval soon. If that goes through, we will be having someone in our home at least 7X a month. That kinda stresses me out a bit. I want more results with so much help but I know that slow and steady wins the race.

-I am hoping to find a small group for me and the girls to build our signing skills.

-We are having to replace the pad in our carpet due to the ridiculous amount of dog pee in our carpet. :( If this doesn't work, we will have to replace all the carpet completely.

-I am addicted to "wedding cake with cream" sno cones!

-The girls and I are still working on refinishing the "breakfast booth" and a new armoire for their room. I love working as a team with them toward a goal. They are so proud of their work and it is a great opportunity for conversation and laughs.

Have a great May!